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Dumbo Strikes Back [Call of the Wild]


They say an elephant never forgets your face.

They say an elephant never forgets your face.

Gabon, New Year’s Eve, 2002:

She was about seven feet at the shoulder, with sixteen-inch tusks, and weighed two tons. I used to have zero fear. Zero. I could walk up to any elephant I saw. So when she charges, I bluff back, but it doesn’t stop her. I run to get between her and the group I’m with, including my girlfriend. The elephant’s got her head down, ears tucked, doing this kind of shuffle. I’m thinking, I’ve got about a second to stop this thing. She’s thinking, I’m going to kill you. Do I straight-arm her, or do I run? But when she gets within three feet, I take three steps to run and — boom — I trip and hit the ground.

I immediately turn… Continue reading

Sliding to Oblivion [Look Before You Leap. Or not.]

As a recent New York Times story by Christina Erb pointed out, avalanches continue to wreak havoc across the West. According to the American Alpine Institute, there have been 31 deaths this year alone, and we’re not even deep into the more dangerous months of early spring. The problem? Weather, sure. But many deaths in the backcountry are preventable with proper testing of conditions and common sense. Here, via the American Alpine Institute’s blog, is a compilation of avalanches that will scare you. Or really, really should. No charge for the (ironic, we hope) AC/DC soundtrack. RELATED: The amazing footage of a skier who survived a fall of 351 feet

Signs O’ The Times


Hanging on at #3 in this week’s Most-Emailed List is The Gray Lady‘s recent foray into gradeschool off-kilter humor, an in-depth analysis of Britain’s cheeky place names like Butt Hole Road, Crapstone, and Wetwang. It’s a reminder that in grim economic times such as these, nothing leavens the load quite so quickly as a good penis joke, especially in the paper of record. Surely there are more great ones worth sharing out there. Send them in!